Post Traumatic Sydrome

I know that this is no laughing matter, but I feel like I just went through Post Traumatic Syndrome this week. I had a very difficult couple of weeks, and once everything was finished and the last song had been sung and the last book had been put away on Easter morning, I was ready to crash. Not more than two days later, I got very sick. I somehow was able to have both a bad Flu virus and Strep Throat at the same time. I dont remember the last time I went from chills right into the sweats and back into the chills again. I guess I can be happy I had some sick time to take off from work and do some serious recovery. Now, all is well again, and I'm ready to take on the world. Last night, I just had to get out for a nice long walk... wonderful.

The School choir had its "return" practice yesterday. We had so much fun. Every one of those who came were in a great mood, and were excited to be back together again. (We're getting the band back together.) By the time it was over, my heart was racing, and I had to stop before I got to a couple songs I wanted to play with because we ran out of time. What a fantastic feeling. When we had mass this morning, that energy carried over. They were so good today, and I am so honored to be up there leading them.

So, now the tedious work begins, putting everything back together. My office is in shambles, my music files are seperated out into stacks from various days we sang, and I have a new season to tweak and primp so that I can offer the best possible worship experience. I have come to love my "creative" days as I call them. These are the days I can step back from the administration parts of the job, and really dream about what this music program can be. I think the rest of this week can be used for a bit of that time. I have some new songs I'm getting excited about. I have some young cantors that I am looking forward to seeing what their made of. It's a brand new day.

P.S. Ugh... wouldn't you know it, but I forgot to thank John, the fantastic guy who covered for my while I was sick this last weekend. He is definately one of my best resources, trusted advisors, and good friends. Thanks John.

Inspiration and Perspiration

I just thought I'd throw in a quick update on all the fun things happening in my life these days.

With Holy Week being this week, I'm kinda out of my head with everything that I need to get done before Wednesday and beyond roll around. I forced myself to take today completely off. It's so easy for me to go in just to get something done, but right now, I need to take the time when I can get it. I know I'll be running around like a crazy person soon, so I enjoyed my time to myself.

I joined several people and we started a dinner club. Our first dinner was on Friday, and it was so much fun. We have 5 "families" involved and a total of 7 people. I was quite impressed with the creativity first of all. I think we were there till nearly 11 o'clock that night just talking and laughing the night away. I cant wait till our next one in April.

I've been arranging quite a bit of music these days for various instruments and voices. A few of my arrangements will be used during our services this week, so I'm pretty pumped about that. I am really getting into using Sibelius which my choir gave me as a surprise Christmas gift. It is much more powerful than my other program, and a lot more rewarding. I can potentially whip out an arrangement for four or five instruments in about an hour now. I've also been playing more piano these days too. To me, it feels like I'm just tinkering around, but people seem to like it, so I'll keep going. Nothing wrong with a simple improv once in a while. Of course, now their staring to ask for me to try playing the organ. It's kind of scary that I am the parish organist all of a sudden. Last I knew, I was brought in as a guitarist. Oh well!

Lets see... other things. I've been getting into baking, candy making and card making these days. I've run into a number of old friends lately... fun! I really feel like I need a spiritual director or something similar to help me stay on the right path. Life is terribly busy, but very good right now. I cant wait till this week is over.

I'll leave you with a few quotes I borrowed from one of my favorite websites, Just Plain Folks.

"Getting there isn't half the fun - it's all the fun." -Robert Townsend

"Grab a chance and you won't be sorry for a might have been." -Arthur Ransome

"Sometimes all you have to do to inspire humans to greatness is give them a reason and an opportunity to do something great." -Brian Austin Whitney

Once Upon a Time

During my day off today, I decided to watch my movies that have been sitting in my apartment for the last few days. (I do Blockbuster Online) One of these movies really touched me for many reasons. Maybe its the musician in me or the songwriter or even the person struggling to find that great relationship.

The movie I'm referring to is Once, a low budget and gritty movie about, in my opinion, finding one great friend who "gets" you. There is a lot of great music performed by the songwriters themselves. The movie is about a guy (in the credits named "guy") who makes a living out by fixing vacuum cleaners and singing songs on the streets of Dublin. He meets a girl (named... you got it... "girl") who takes a keen interest in him and his music. The movie is so simple and real, that it speaks volumes about being true to who you are no matter what, following the dreams of your heart, and respecting everything about the people you encounter.

I think the reason I was moved so much by this movie is that I feel so much like the hero portrayed. He recently ended a relationship and is wandering around looking for meaning in everything. When he finds someone who takes an interest in him and helps nudge him toward being a more than he was, he gets the signals mixed up for a time, then realizes the gem he has in her. I wonder if that's what I've been looking for for so long... someone who can inspire me, someone who can be my muse and push me to greater things.

I know it sounds selfish to say that, but it's real. Who knows what form this person is going to come in, but I do know that our friendship will be the stuff from which poems are written and legends told. I know I've missed quite a few opportunities for this kind of relationship, and I am willing to admit that I may lack what it takes to make a relationship like this happen, but I feel, right now, a longing for it. I just hope I'm ready for it when it comes. :)